FINALLY: The secret to a fulfilling life. It's not only to understand why what happens happens. Nor is it more money, nor to have more time. It's not even in having outstanding relationships - although all these are indeed important.

A fulfilling life is deceptively simple: - to achieve what you really want. Although there are probably many areas that need attention, this is a very good place to start. Find out...

Why the Opposite Keeps Showing Up

Do you find that although you declare something as a goal, the opposite keeps showing up. You want more time for yourself, and you find you have less time. You want more peace at work, and the new boss rattles your cage. You want more money, and unexpected expenses create even less money than before?

I'm So Impatient!

One rather amusing incident happened to a client, Graham. He was often impatient, and unhappy about his lack of patience! Our discussion led him to declare, in more or less these words:


Then guess what.

Next time, he arrived late for his Life Strategies session. Apologetically, he described what had happened. He had started out more or less on time, but the narrow winding road gave him no room to overtake a very slow truck. I was stuck behind the truck for a few miles, he complained.

Life had brought him yet another situation which would enable him to become more patient. The perfect opportunity for him to develop the patience he had declared he wanted!

Being Really Loving

It was a warm summer’s evening in Cape Town, South Africa. We were all enjoying our personal development course, and Mary decided to go for it. She declared herself as really loving. ‘I am Love’, she said. Then what happened?

Her relationship broke up and the man she loved fell in love with another woman. So she got really angry at life for bringing her the opposite of what she had declared herself as.

Yet what had happened here?

She had declared herself as love, NOT as loving just this particular man. As real love - unconditional love - rather than the usual needy exchange which many if not most of us misunderstand as love. And in moving away, he gave her the perfect opportunity for her to know herself as love, even as he declared his love for another. The Universe brought her the perfect circumstances to really be love, just as she had declared.

Mary's Opportunity - Every Cloud has a Silver Lining

She then had the opportunity to show love, to be love, even though the opposite had shown up. This is the position of a master of life, a loving master knows herself to be love despite what occurs in her life - especially when the opposite happens.

When life brings you the opposite, view it as a perfect opportunity to experience being whatever you've chosen to be.


When Mary declared herself as love, she decided to be love. No ifs, buts or whens. Her ‘I am’ declaration was unconditional, and powerfully creative. Life then brought her the perfect situation - rejection - to really know herself as unconditional love.

But she gave her power away by reacting angrily. Her need to have this particular man in her life stopped her experiencing the situation powerfully. And her angry emotional reaction made the barrier between them even larger. It made it even more unlikely that they'd ever get back together.

So don't give your power away to your needs. When you react you may wonder why you are not feeling powerful. It’s simple, whenever you give your power away, you have less power!

Life is On Your Side

Both Graham and Mary had created the ideal circumstances to bring about the outcome they had declared for themselves. And both reacted with their previous patterns rather than choosing differently. But here's how life works:

The same old situation - although wearing a different face, or with different players - will continue to show up in your life. Then your discomfort and your unhappiness with your same old reaction to the same old situation will continue to get worse - until you get the message and respond more appropriately.

Life is not evil, it gently supports you in your desire to move on. So it keeps bringing you the ideal circumstances to change your reactions, to respond so that you are stuck no longer. There are two Natural Laws at work here.

• The Absence Principle, and
  
  
• The Law of Attraction.
  

Remember that mixed results come when your thoughts, your words and your actions are not in alignment with reality. Confused choices give confused results.

The Absence Principle

It's your need for a specific result which calls this Natural Law into play. The Absence Principle operates when you reject a situation you don't want. It's your rejection, the calling it punishment, or evil, or bad luck, your non-acceptance which invokes it.

It's best summed up in that wonderful saying,


This is the Relative World - here everything is relative - so there are an infinite number of contrasting diads; abundance/scarcity, day/night, tall/short, here/there, before/after, victory/defeat...

Let's use an innocuous diad, hot and cold. The Absence Principle explains that opposites don't exist, except in the space of each other. That is, without really knowing cold, we cannot really know its opposite - hot. So to know hot, we need to really experience cold. Not just understand cold, not to just know about cold, but really know cold.

Real Knowing takes Experience

What does "really know" cold mean?

It means to really accept, approve and appreciate cold. You need to accept cold for exactly what it is. Approve of it, perhaps because of the lessons available from it. Then you appreciate it for being in your life, and would not have it any other way.

Then you’ve preferred what has occurred, even if it's only for the motivation it provided. When you can do all three - accept, approve and appreciate it without rejection, without negativity - then you authentically know cold.

Notice that without really knowing the opposite which contrasts your experience of hot, the concept can only be intellectual. To know about is usually just book learning, hearsay. There's very little of your time and energy in knowing about. Real knowing takes experience.

So you need to know both hot and cold to really know either. Not just know about cold. Note this does not say you need to choose cold, but you do need to know what cold really is. This enables you to freely choose either hot or cold as required.

This suggests that whenever you reject cold, or judge it as wrong, then you don't really know it, you just know about it. Notice that cold is not actually the opposite of hot, it's the same thing - temperature - with a different amount of heat.

The Problem - You're Attached to The Outcome

The more skillful you become in handling life, the more you can fully accept whatever comes along. Acceptance helps you avoid suffering through another Natural Law, the Law of Attraction.

Life does not want you to remain stuck, to keep suffering, so it brings you the exact circumstances you need to handle in a new way that will enable you to stop suffering. The perfect situation which you need to accept, approve and appreciate so that you can truly know it. Then you can let it go.

So don’t crave anything. Stop needing, wanting or yearning for it, simply desire it. But what's the difference?

• Craving suggests you are totally dissatisfied until you get it.
  
  
• Need suggests you can't do without it.
  
  
• Want suggests that you are unhappy if you don't get it.
  
  
• Yearning suggests unhappiness until you get it
  

All of these say you do NOT appreciate your current situation, which means you do NOT really know it. There's a gift in the present moment - it's an opportunity for you to move on.

So what about desire? Here the important distinction is that you are not necessarily attached to any particular result. Don't allow the outcome to hold any particular charge for you. Either it comes, or it doesn't come. You may, or may not, even have it now. So what - allow both results to be equally okay.

Whenever you crave, need, want, or yearn for anything, you give your power away. Because if you get it, you're happy and if you don't get it, you're unhappy. So your happiness lies in the thing that your crave or yearn for. And by giving your power away you remain stuck.

Whereas a desire - without any attachment to the result - means that you can be happy with or without it, either way.

What Suffering Tells You

There's a lesson in your suffering. It's simply an indication that there's something to be remembered here. An internal change to be made regarding acceptance of this situation. Or, in other words, something for you to let go of.

Until you let go, life seems to keep bringing you situations tailor made to show you that your previous reaction didn't work for you. So you can see even more clearly than last time that you need to change your mind. To realize there is something here to accept, approve and appreciate.

But when you see that there's a change for you to make, how often do you label it suffering? You prefer to hang on to your suffering rather than to remember what the situation is telling you! Rather just let it go.

Your Life is NOT Falling Apart

It's not that your life is falling apart. it's that your life is falling together. You can't move towards what you want without moving away from what is so right now. And this requires that you change.

Life knows the best way to help you get there. Which is rarely the way you would have chosen. So you judge it as uncomfortable, and react the same as last time.

What do you really want? To change - or to remain uncomfortable? Embrace the uncomfortable, it's there to help you achieve the change in your life that you really want.

When you let go of your disapproval, your rejection, your aversion to the circumstances, you also stop suffering in such situations. Then you can simply enjoy what happens. Your joy shows you are on your way to mastery.

When you have let it all such ineffective reactions go, you will have mastered these circumstances. Then you'll find this area will let go of you. Your life will stop bringing you opportunities that you think are problems, and you can stop wasting your time and energy. Now you really know it from all angles. You've at last let it go - and can now move on.

Your Dilemma

This dilemma is very real. When the opposite keeps showing up, you may be tempted to think that things are not working for you. But they are.

The problem is that you need to change the way you see things, and until you make this change, the outside situation won't really change. You may think the problem has gone away, but it will resurface, often looking slightly different but with no fundamental change.

Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world, and until you make the internal changes needed, how can your outer world, your circumstances, change?

At Life Strategies, you will learn how to work with these empowering distinctions, how to achieve what you really want to achieve, and not to end up with what you don't want. Learning the value behind whatever shows up is an important step toward this.

Yet if this wasn't already abundantly clear to you, then self-sabotage has probably stopped you reaching this conclusion!

But I Know All This, some say

If you believe you know all this, but the opposite continues to keep showing up, then you do NOT know it, although you may know about it. You can't fool the universe, the proof of the pudding is in the eating.

Much of the human race lives in denial. And this doesn't mean on the river in Egypt! We say we want:

• to care for the Earth, yet we chop down her rain-forests and plunder her resources as unlimited
  
  
• a society free of rage and violence, then we entertain ourselves - and our children - with TV programs of graphic rage and violence
  

• our young ones to be responsible, yet our school "Zero-Tolerance" laws take that responsibility away by mandating totally disproportionate responses
  

• the truth, yet we follow Adolf Hitler's strategy of lying whenever we think it expedient. After all - doesn't The End Justify The Means?
  

Do any of these strategies work to give us the outcomes that we desire? Isn't there sufficient evidence of their inevitable consequences right in front of our eyes?

If you are not experiencing the results you genuinely want, then you cannot really know "All This." Your experience will change when you have changed.

If any of this speaks to your heart, then you know that truth has its own beauty. The elegance of truth gladdens the heart. If you continue exploring these truths, they will bring amazing joy into your life.

The difference between just knowing about, and authentic knowing, is a crucial distinction which makes a world of difference, one which self-sabotage has obviously been keeping from you.

Stop your Self-Sabotage

Achieving what you really want means learning how to overcome your self-sabotage mechanism. Everyone has one, and it operates all the time.

The self-sabotage mechanism generally operates through context, not through content. What's the difference?

• your context is where you come from when you do what you do
  
  
• your content is what you do, how you handle your affairs
  

So learn to manage your context, and stop your self-sabotage. Find out how to do what works, and not do what doesn't work for you. Do more with less! Invest to learn how you can achieve more while saving both time and energy with this ground-breaking, twenty-first century, e-book program and action plan.

Why Invest in Improving Your Capabilities?

An investment has a return, and your return in stopping your self-sabotage is enormous. There's no bigger return than in improving your capabilities, in becoming more effective. Life Strategies clients experience becoming at least 20% more effective, and one client recently reported an increase of ninety percent after just one year.

In the long run, your increase in effectiveness will increase your earnings by at least the same amount. And the increase is permanent. As Benjamin Franklin famously observed,


How much will a twenty percent increase in earnings amount to in dollars over the rest of your life?

Work this out right now! Don't allow yourself to self-sabotage, take the time to answer to this crucial question this very moment - it'll change your life!

The result of your calculations will prove to you beyond doubt that your increase in earnings will pay for your investment in yourself many, many times over.

Yet, just like heat from a fire, results always take a little time and effort. You first have to buy the logs, then you need to put some kindling in the stove before putting in the wood. Only then can you light and look after the fire, which after a small delay will give you heat.

Enjoy a big 25% discount - as well as some very special bonuses - if you act today. There is no better way to improve your income than by stopping your self-sabotage with...

Your results are guaranteed, and so is your investment! We eliminate all and any risk with your 100%, no-questions-asked, more-than-you-paid, two-way, 365-day unconditional guarantee.

Food for Thought